I know what I said a couple of posts back about not questioning the journey once the challenge has been accepted but sometimes I'm wrong. I'm over it. The only thing I like about my life right now is the ability to get stuff done during the day because I'm not at work. Everything else is a lonely frustrating verb conjugating, gender/article/number agreement hell. I'm full circle back to America, fuck yea, speak English. When you become the center of commerce and science, we'll speak your language. Until then, I've got a smart phone with internet and Google translate. You'll probably speak English; I'll get by with Google when you don't.
So this post won't be about growth and accepting professional dares because they sound cool or you're bored. It will be about the courage of quitting. Of letting yourself down and letting others down and realizing nobody dies when that happens.
3 comments:
Oh no! Sounds like you're as bad at languages as I am.
You know Lodo, I don't think you have to be good at something to enjoy it. That's why every year every televised talent show has the blooper reel of passionate talentless people. I do not enjoy this. I dread it. I'm anxious to the point of distraction. I sigh five times an hour and never feel like I'm getting a deep breath. I'm coming a bit unwound. This would have been a dubious assignment choice without the pain of language, with it, I'm wrecked. I keep thinking, I'm feeling this way to speak a nearly dead language that I can't use anywhere else in the world so in a year I can pack up all my shit again, traumatize my dog, switch to 220 voltage and live in a still developing nation. My motivation is lacking and the teaching style and lack of peers to commiserate with just makes that stew a little thicker.
Not sure what to say to that. Though "the blooper reel of passionate talentless people" got a laugh out of me.
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