Dear Kissy face man,
The camera loves you baby. Almost as much as you love yourself. What I'm wondering is why you think it interests me in the least that you are traveling to Philly and staying at the Marriott. That's why I replied with '6' when you asked me to send you a number. I'm glad you thought it was 'lol' funny but I'm for reals not giving you my number. Why you are still trying to talk to me after I made fun of your pictures is a mystery to me. A disconcerting mystery. A 'I-might-go-missing-if-I-meet-you mystery.' A 'I'm-not-sure-that's-really-you mystery.'
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Actual letters:
To his initial 'hi' a few days ago:
Dude! What is the DEAL with that kissy face you are making? So, so un-ninja. One of the first things they teach you in ninja school.
To his 'send a number' followed by 'lol' when I sent him the number 6:
Also don't give out my number right away. Don't get me wrong, I don't like to drag things out forever online but I at least want to chat a little here. So tell you what, you really want a number, I'll give you a digit for every e-mail-two if you make me laugh or make me think. You're a great looking man so I have no doubt you don't "need" to be on here to have company. I'm pretty amazing myself so I don't need to give out my number to every guy who asks for it. But I do want to know more so...over to you my kissy face friend. (NOTE: He REALLY has to overcome that kissy face picture. It's ridiculous.)
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Then he told me he was staying at the Marriott. What am I missing here?
3 comments:
So once again I dare to show my face in the world that we call, well we don't really call it anything, so let's just say "here". That sounds good. So I have missed you and while I am not actually any sort of "back" I am on the internet and cruising around for something that can be considered less boring than nothing, which is pretty much everything.
As it so happens I come acrossed this post and I have an instant visualization that most definitely needs to be shared...
Now I am on a protected network at the moment so I can not navigate to the site and give you the exact link, but you need to, if you haven't already, check out hotchickswithdouchebags.com
This guy is the leading most expert on all things douchey and it cracks me up because the kissy lips pose is a classic douche move that all of us who struggle to not be the douche know, is a move to most definitely avoid.
Now the knowledge of the douchebag and all of his known moves have spread throught the Googleness, but hotchickswithdouchebags.com is the originator of all said information. Hell, I keep his book on my coffee table as a constant reminder of how to avoid all doucheiness possible.
But anyways, I missed you, thought I would drop in, later...
MP!!! Always good to hear from you. Glad you had a minute to stop by and that I made the cut as 'better than nothing.' :-) Thanks for the link and look forward to the next time we see you here in Ava-land.
I love the idea of earning a phone number! Word of advice to kissy-face: go for the laughs!
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