Stairmaster works out at the gym attached to my building. The gym has floor to ceiling windows facing the alley I walk through to work every day. When I first moved here, I started waving at Stairmaster when I walked by in the morning. I don't know why I did it, perhaps because Stairmaster is INTENSE. He is always going to town on the Stairmaster and simultaneously lifting at least 30 pound dumbbells. Intense. Maybe I wanted to see if he would wave back, lose balance, knock himself unconscious with one of the weights, I don't know. He always acknowledged my wave without missing a beat on his relentless climb to nowhere.
A few weeks ago, I met Stairmaster on land and honestly didn't recognize him at first. I was running late for a meeting so I was not engaged in the conversation the way I should have been but it was long enough that I learned he lived in the condo complex and something about a boat that he's always on--that's the part where I was not really listening or engaged. So I rushed away and felt bad for doing so but I did make it on time to my meeting on two wheels with smoking tires.
Since we met, Stairmaster has taken it up a notch and is now blowing me kisses. Earlier this week, he came out to make quick small talk while I was walking by and told me I looked nice. Yesterday, he made the kiss face without blowing it, which to me is a little more construction guy aggressive than a playful blown kiss. WTF is that? I'm not sure where all this is going but I'm now walking the long way to work to avoid walking past the gym because I'm not quite sure what one does when a guy makes that face at you. My smile and wave seems inadequate. I feel like he's inviting me to make out with him through the glass.
I'm pretty sure that he's at least 15 years older than me because a: older men are my key demographic and b: there are way too many much younger, better dressed girls walking around this city that he would/could be chasing if he were younger. Regardless of his age, he needs to just ask me out. I'm tired of not being able to walk by the gym without feeling like I have to look for him just so he can semi freak me out with his suggestive lip gestures. I feel 12 years old when he does that. I just want to say 'ewwwww!' and run away.
5 comments:
That's hysterical and freaky. I would totally do the same thing and avoid walking past the gym.
Another cracking post lady! You are so funny, it's a real treat to read :-) Thanks for the compliment about the photo, I just wanted to share a little bit of the London springtime sunshine with everyone :-)
Hi! I'm new to your blog, but anything Afternoon Tea Breach recommends is something I always follow :) I love your thoughts - insightful and hilarious. Will be adding you to my favorite blogs on my site. Keep them coming!
*Afternoon Tea Break, with a K. You can see that I'm typing too fast today :)
Laura, you make me blush :-) I'm touched by the compliment.
Funny you should have typed in "breach" - I DID breach afternoon tea today: I had all my tea breaks in the morning instead. But there you go.
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