A black man on a bicycle will tell me I am pretty. I don't know what it is but a man who does not appear to be holding a lot of winning cards is so often willing to try to ask out a girl on the street. I literally walked past a guy last week who just looked at me and said, 'can I get your number?' Not 'Hello, Good Morning, Nice weather we're having..' Just straight to the point. I can't remember if I resurrected the fake boyfriend of just said no but I love it.
No one looks cool mouthing along the words to whatever they are listening to on their iPod. No one.
I may be afraid of my own power and I may be afraid of learning what my limitations are by exercising power.
My favorite pick up line will probably always be, 'Is your dog friendly? (Yes) Are you?' My girlfriend likes, 'Is he treating you right?' because it kills two birds with one stone; are you single and if you aren't, are you happy?
I should probably stop talking to the television about how stupid its commercials are. I don't have to watch.
I should probably look around before deciding to have a conversation with myself in the park at night to be sure I am alone. The homeless man didn't seem to be bothered by my soliloquy but I probably would not have grunted so loud and would have used my library voice to narrate how arduous it was to pick up Baloo's poop with my trick back.
And you definitely should speak of cupping as Chinese cupping massage and even then you need to rush to explain what it is to (especially) guys before their eyebrows arch. Or maybe you shouldn't talk about it at all at work. That would probably work too.
3 comments:
That's a good pic on Baloo.
Talking to yourself--the curse of the writer! Or thinker. Here in New York, if you walk around Tribeca or Williamsburg, you can pass all the writers and artists mumbling to themselves--enmeshed in internal conversations as they bump into each other on the sidewalk. Lost in their thoughts. Or their Ipods--mouthing the words!
funny that no one looks cool mouthing the words to the song they're listening to on their iPod. i always feel totally cool when i'm doing it, but when i see someone else do it, i mentally note how stupid they look.
Megan, that is exactly why I wrote that! I saw our resident hot guy mouthing the words to whatever he was listening. I used to think I was cool too but I saw him and thought, wow, he can't even pull that off.
Post a Comment